Hello Vladimir,
Good to read your essay, and there's a lot that I agree with there. Also entertaining and funny, the architecture analogy, and relevant as well.
As you say, we need a paradigm shift, with new fundamental principles, from which we rebuild. But how to see which starting point? I can show a few pointers, and that it has to be entirely new.
There are around ten different ways of seeing current physics, and the difference between them is often simply the order in which we put things. This concept is fundamental, while this concept is emergent, and further up the food chain. The speed of light is constant, and we adjust everything to that. Or the speed of light is variable, and we put something else underneath it. These alternatives are often equivalent, and we have a puzzle that can be rejigged into various different arrangements, but none necessarily leads to real progress.
It's easy to say let's cut through the Gordian knot, if we can't decide which of the loose bits of string coming out of it should be worked from. But I say if you look carefully, there are clues as to what the starting point should be, and they should lead (to make a truly mixed metaphor) towards a new set of concepts that will be like a sword to cut through the whole knot.
The deepest cracks in our present picture are the very places where the best clues are to be found about what the real picture should look like. Time is the deepest crack in our picture. Things really don't match up there. This crack has been papered over until recently, but now we're having to look right into it instead, because of quantum gravity.
You say time isn't real, and that only the 'now' exists. Most people who say time isn't real say the opposite - that the 'now' doesn't exist. Block time, which comes unavoidably out of Minkowski's geometry, has led many to think time doesn't exist in the sense that motion through time doesn't exist. Instead, they think every 'now' moment exists at once, and they all sit there alongside each other in a block. That's the standard GR view, in as far as there is one. It isn't talked about a lot, as you need at least one unexplained illusion to make it work.
But the differences in time rate in different places look very real, and are not addressed in either of these views. I've studied the idea of an illusion, it doesn't work, for several reasons. I say that motion through time has to be real, and in my essay I've shown that one of our two pictures of time has to be ruled out, as they can't co-exist.
What I'm saying to you is that if you try ruling out block time, and say that the rules about simultaneity at a distance are slightly different from what we think (which is very possible as we don't understand time, but have depended on assumptions about time in Minkowski's geometry), then you get a picture of a dynamic universe, in which motion through time is real.
So in the deduced picture motion through time is somehow real, and to me this view has been arrived at via a very logical sequence of reasoning, as in my essay - you can test every step on the way. And in this picture time seems to run at different rates in different places, so that should be the starting point, and to me it seems much more likely to lead somewhere than other starting points that lead off from here...
Hope this is of interest, best wishes, Jonathan