Joe,
a very interesting essay to read. You are tackling some really important issues but it frustrates me slightly because you are taking a different explanatory pathway to my own and naturally want to yell "Hey Joe, this way".
Its a really good point that we [without use of x-ray machines or their ilk] only see surfaces. That is, I agree, reality but I would restrict it to Image reality, a sub set of the Entirety of reality. I think re not seeing objects moving at different speeds, we are not actually seeing substantial objects themselves but our sensory systems fabrication of images of them.
Likewise the [image of an] object can as you say get smaller [as distance between the observer and [source]object increases].Its really interesting that this facet of relativity has had little attention. Though Julian Barbour on his http://www.platonia.com/ideas.html says "Relativity of size is such an attractive principle, I long believed that a dynamics of pure shape would one day be found, but in the last two years my thinking has changed somewhat." I have only alluded to this size relativity in my own essay by indicating the relevance of projective geometry to Image reality formation.
Enough said- an enjoyable easy read, profound ideas and thoughts. I hope you find other readers who appreciate where your conclusions are coming from even if not exactly agreeing with them. Kind regards Georgina