This paper is a significant work Lawrence...
From my view; your work is coming to resemble more and more that of Ed Witten. I mean that both as a compliment and a criticism. On the one hand; you are a truly deep thinker with a good grounding in the Maths that let you express your thoughts. On the other hand; your paper is dense with Math and the reader gets immersed pretty quickly, which can overwhelm some who are less Math-agile, and overload some who are - before they get your point. I get the same effect from reading Connes. I know there is something amazing there, and it's exciting to try to follow it, but it's easy to get lost if you don't know some of the technical terms and techniques well.
So I give you high marks but not full credit. This work is patently amazing, and it is obvious that it addresses the organizers' questions in a detailed way, but you make me go back to the books a bit too often - in order to fully grasp your point. I am not 100% sure I understand you completely yet, and I feel that this contest is a forum for people like yourself to prove their ability to reach a broader audience. All in all; I think you did quite well. It almost comes across as a advertisement for Szangolies and Palmer in places, though, and they may not need the boost. But I will help you a bit.
This is a paper I'll probably read multiple times, for what it is worth. There is a lot of meaning to mine from this exploration.
All the Best,
Jonathan